My life seems to be full of clichés from strangers. As a parent of twins, I have pretty much heard every twin one going (double trouble/got your hands full etc etc) But as they’ve gotten older and dress so differently, I have a new range of probing questions. Bearing in mind my girls for ONE MORNING a week…I don’t even get to eat lunch in that time slot. But apparently when you get three whole hours once a week you’re a lady of leisure.The amount of times people instantly ask the following, surely I can’t be alone?
- Are you going to get a job? If I had a quid for the amount of times people have asked me that then I wouldn’t need a job ever! It’s the FIRST thing people say to me as I mention they have started at nursery. Now. Let me think. At present, they go from 9-12 on a Friday. Come September they will go every afternoon so fair enough asking. HOWEVER. hey officially start at 12.30ppm, then you read with them until 12.45pm so by the time I get home it’ll probably be 1pm. I have to leave the house about 2.50pm to go get C, so if anyone wants to employ me 1pm until 2.50pm every afternoon, term time only and subject to illness and school activities then YES, please do snap me up.
- What will you do with your time? Sleep? I wish. As pointed out above, the day is already significantly shortened with travelling etc so by the time I;ve got home and tidied up the lunchtime chaos I’ll probably have just over an hour? I’m guessing pampering and endless shopping trips are kinda out the window then.
- Your house will be spotless. Ahem Ok, they clearly do not know my bad Mom confessions. For about an hour it’ll look quite tidy…then my three kids will come home and utter chaos will be resumed.
- Ladies what lunch. I eat my dinner with the kids at silly o’clock plus nursery always falls around lunchtime and no one want to go for lunch at 9.22am do they?
- Time for another? Sorry, let me stoop laughing my face off. Another? Did you not realise I HAVE TWINS. Two humans of exactly the same age that stretched my body more than I ever thought humanly possible? The fact that they are almost three and still can be found getting into our bed at crazy hours. My sanity twitches at the mere mention of more babies.
- Where’s that time gone? Say this one and I may cry. I feel utterly bereft that my little crew is slowly disbanding. They are off on their big adventure and for the first time, three really is a crowd.
It’s probably best not to say anything to me about nursery to avoid a sarcastic/weepy reply. Damn you nursery and damn you time making my babies grow up WAY too fast.