Are We A Big Family?

After flicking through a Sunday supplement there was an article about a girl who was one of eleven. The article was her view on life as part of a big family. Eleven kids – wow I thought but as I scrolled down, there were a few stats at the bottom to run alongside the piece. One being about the largest family in the UK with 17 kids but the other facts stated that 1.1 million families in the UK have 3 or more kids and that Tower Hamlets in London has the highest number of families with 3 or more kids.

Ok fair enough but does having 3 kids really warrant a large family tag? The fact that these statistics are included in an article about a girl who has 10 siblings would infer that 3 kids is a lot!

It got me thinking – are we as a two parent, three child family really classed as a large family?

I always wanted 3 kids for as long as I can remember and had 3 kids from just 2 pregnancies and I have pretty much the perfect mix of sexes and amount of children I desired but never for one minute would I class it as large. But after thinking about it – has society pigeon holed us and given us the label of a large family?

Most family ticket deals for days out are for 2 adults and 2 children; trying to find a family hotel room that accommodates more than 2 children can be a absolute nightmare when planning a holiday and all the 2 for 1 deals just don’t work for us. Is the old fashioned 2.4 kids still “the norm”? And why is everything still geared towards that figure? I have one sister, my parents each had one sibling and in total I have 4 cousins –  yep, just 4 – that’s it! My family is very small and I remember when I was younger and my best friend has hundreds of cousins always popping over or her going out for days with a variety of aunties and uncles whereas I had no real close extended family – and I often felt jealous. My Dad, although he was one only of two, would tell me stories about his huge network of relations as his parents were one of 8 and I loved the whole family orientated vibe it had with people always popping in and looking out for one another.

Sadly there are such a negative stereotypes attached to large familes namely that they’re all “scroungers who live off the state and expect the tax payer to provide for their kids” and I’m sure that there are but like people with no children you will always get someone somewhere happy to play the system but because larger families obviously will be entitled to more (as most forget each single child is taken int account, just like in a 2 or 3 person family) yet there is such uproar.

Whenever the question of more children pops up I always go back to my Dad and his stories and ultimately I would love a large family. Whilst I always wanted 3 there are days where I question this (usually when everyone has slept, ehaved and just generally a decent day!) and would absolutely love to extend our brood. I want to grow up surrounded by all my family and their children as to me family is by far the most important thing in the world. I know there’s the financial side of raising children, not to mention needing a large car and house but if you could put all that aside – would you’ve more?

People who are part of big families sometimes tell me it’s not all it’s cracked up to be; there’s feuds, bickering, jealousy and of course the expense but I always go back to my Dad saying how much he loved having big family meet ups where everyone knew everyone and someone always had your back. Perhaps it’s because I do have such a small network that I crave this “big happy family” ideology but technically we are a big family and that baffles me! I love my kids, yes we jumped from having 1 only child to 3 in one swoop but I am lucky to be able to spend lots of one on one time with them so I don’t feel that my household is too large to cope with; the amount of washing on the other hand…! I don’t know what the future holds but I am incredibly happy with my babies – mountains of washing or not. Surely with more “blended” families 2.4 is so outdated. What do you think, would you class 3 kids as being a large family? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

B xx

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  1. 1st April 2015 / 8:21 am

    I think in this day and age, 3 is classed as a big family as more and more family’s are only having 1 Baby because they can’t afford to bring up any more. I have a baby who is 7 weeks old and would love more but don’t think I could afford it 🙁

  2. 1st April 2015 / 9:49 am

    I wouldn’t say three is large, but I am not quite sure what I would class as a large family? It’s a shame that family passes etc are not more flexible depending on the number of children you have.
    I think expense does have a lot to do with one child families and that might be making 3 child families seem ‘large’.

  3. 1st April 2015 / 1:30 pm

    I’ve always wanted 3 children too! I wouldn’t class 3 children as a big family. I think people’s perceptives will differ based on their own families, or what they’ve grown up around. I was an only child for ten years, but my street was filled with families with 3 children, I’d think of 5/6plus as a big family xx

  4. 1st April 2015 / 8:15 pm

    I personally wouldn’t class three as a large family as I’m one of three and come from a big family. My hubby on the other hand comes from a very small family and thinks our two are more than enough. His brother doesn’t want children & his only cousin doesn’t want to add to the one they’ve already got so I guess it depends on the person. Totally agree about the ‘family tickets’ though!! x

  5. 1st April 2015 / 10:06 pm

    I think two kids is average, three is still pretty normal and any more than three kids is a big family. For me, three would make our family HUGE hehe, I’m done with two! x

  6. 2nd April 2015 / 2:27 am

    I’m from a family of three, so I don’t think of it as being large. I’ve always wanted lots of kids (I’m thinking five minimum!) but I would imagine we will probably only have two or three at a push, because I simply don’t think we could afford more!

  7. 2nd April 2015 / 10:36 am

    No I don’t think 3 children makes a big family, I am one of three girls and didn’t feel like I came from a big family. Seven and eight children makes a big family. I have two beautiful girls of my own now and think I am sooo lucky. Lucy

  8. Terrie
    4th April 2015 / 10:00 am

    This question has been playing on my mind a lot recently. I have four and think most would consider us large. I would like another one – but as everyone has said, the cost rule it out. We would never have any money to treat the kids that we have.

    However what really stops me is other peoples opinions. Which is wrong in a way. I think there is a stereotype put on large families and it’s not always right. Plus I’m a big believer in ‘live and let live’ – I don’t judge others so why should I care if they judge me?