The Eight REAL Stages of Buying a House

house buying
As you may be aware, we are currently closing in on buying our first house together after years of renting. It’s quite an exciting time and I’ve never bought a house before so I have been completely oblivious to the whole thing. But so far – these eight emotions seem to have formed the step by step process of buying a house. (Obviously if you’re looking for actual helpful advice – probably time to do a better Google search) as this my friends is the real nitty gritty real guide to buying a house.

  1. Excitement

Yes you have made it! Your offer has been accepted. BINGO! That is the hard part out the way and you are going to be an actual adult! With a mortgage!! Get in, let’s start doing the “we are going to own our house” dance; your brain goes into overdrive and your computer goes to Pinterest as you plan colour schemes, new furniture and gorgeous finishing touches to YOUR new house.

2. Fear

Once the initial jubilation wears off thanks to a somewhat unhelpful comment from a relative bursting the bubble, and then you get – the fear. You actually realise that having an offer accepted? Means NOTHING.  Diddly squat. You are in the absolute infancy of this whole malarkey. Oh and you thought you were worldly wise? You’ll be up to your eyeballs in mortgage offers, solicitors and pesky gazumpers bombarding you with phrases and saying you have no idea what the hell they’re on about. You quickly make your Pinterest board private and keep everything crossed.

3. Exhilaration

You will always remember where you were when you got “The phone call” It’s all actually happening. You are arranging dates and you can almost hear the clinking of keys in your hands. You’ve made it! Where’s the booze to celebrate?!

4. Realisation

Hope you kept the cork because before you’ve necked that first glass of bubbles the realisation hits. CRAP. I’ve got to actually pack up all this sh*te sad move it to another house. How the fluff does anyone manage to do ANYTHING with toddler twins on the loose? I struggle to sort socks when they’re in the room so I’m guessing packing up the contents of a house is going to be somewhat impossible. Fab. Pass that booze. I need this, and not to celebrate. Glug.

5. Stress

stress ball
Your life becomes a sea of boxes. You give up any hope of being able to do/find anything. You curse your husband for getting to escape cardboard city as you are left to restrain toddlers from using the boxes as a makeshift playbarn and try to fling themselves off a stack of boxes whilst simultaneously trying to stop the other child ripping open the contents of every single box. Where’s that corked booze?

6. Brief spell of excitement

Moving day is here! You rope in EVERYONE you know to do it all and to help unpack. After a week of arguing with your sister that she’s not arranging my shoes the right way you can finally see light at the end of the tunnel. And are quite pleased with your new house. Big grin at these bricks that you own.

7. Bankruptcy

Yes all your Pinterest boards and hours of scouring the Internet which always results in a purchase soon mounts up. You find yourself obsessing over a duvet set you definitely don’t need but probably won’t be able to sleep without it so you pop to get it (for your health obviously) and come out the shop a few hundred quid lighter. And forgot the linen. And then you realise your spending is quite ridiculous and bank balance is now in a minus. But at least you have 40 pretty wicker hampers that you may need one day.

8. Itchy feet

And just as you think you have finally cracked it (after being forced to sell 37 wicker hampers on eBay – scowl at husband to claw back some money) you then decide after 12 months that you actually want to move as you have forgotten the living hell that is selling/buying a house. And then my friends, the beloved cycle starts all over.

Happy days!

B xx

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6 Comments

  1. August 20, 2015 / 1:21 pm

    Heehee, moving is so stressful, we are definitely never doing it again (unless we win the lottery, in which case I will pay someone to do ALL the moving for me anyway). I spent the summer before we exchanged on our house making daily visits to the solicitor to hurry him up. He never returned my calls so it was easier to go in! xx
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  2. August 21, 2015 / 7:16 am

    Ha! Moving house put me in hospital with a panick attack!
    I’d like to add ‘rage’to the list as the solicitors and estate agents were outrageous in how they handled our move.
    Even when we rolled up with the removal men on the day to get the keys and we couldn’t go in as the money didn’t transfer on time. We ended up in a hotel until 5pm the next da and all of our stuff stayed in the van.
    It had to be the most stress I’ve ever had! Totally worth it though! Enjoy your new palace!!x
    #thelist

  3. August 23, 2015 / 9:22 pm

    I can relate to them all, apart from twins and them opening boxes… My little crawler/standing cruiser has yet to do that! We’re moving next week, so we’re I. The midst of boxes and chaos…. Hope you get moved soon! It’s definitely a stress only those who’ve bought can understand. X
    #thelist
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  4. August 25, 2015 / 7:49 am

    You are so right about everything! I went through all this and it was really stressful and crazy! Buying the house was a really wonderful moment.. we were laughing and dreaming… than the mortgage realization… than the packing and dealing with the kids… Hiring the moving company and finally moving.. Now I feel good and I believe that me and my husband made the right decision. I hope that I will never go through all this again, though! Greets!

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